Burnout Ends When You Stop Participating

On Stillness

Deep breaths.

So, picture this.

It’s Day 1 after my big exit.

The end of my two-week notice. My work laptop is in the mail, off to the next fancy, schmancy “Head of yada yada.”

For the first time since I was... maybe 14 years old, I wake up without a work title.

I shower, get dressed, take my kids to school, and return home to a completely unstructured day.

No meetings. No deadlines. Nothing.

So, what do I do?

I immediately start building a to-do list.

I think about the contract role I’m starting in a few days. Should I clean my office? Maybe tackle the mountain of emails and become an inbox-zero person (I love those people). The house is a mess. Should I clean? Then there’s my business plan for my practice launch, my book, the contacts I need to reconnect with, the networking groups I’ve been meaning to be more active in. And... and... and.

This, friends, is how I realized I was the problem.

Here’s the thing about burnout, overwork, busyness, and hustle culture: it doesn’t work if you don’t subscribe to it. You have to be a willing participant.

This week, I had the pleasure of being a guest on Farnoosh Torabi’s So Money podcast. In the episode, I talk more about my decision to walk away from corporate America and the introspection that followed.

Real introspection. The kind where you sit with yourself and stare into the ugly-the ways you’ve squandered time, disrespected your boundaries, and avoided stillness… and why. It was messy, y'all.

Day 1, I made the list.

By Day 3, I tore it up.

Yes, there are things I need to do, but the order, pace, and importance are entirely up to me.

And I have the freedom to say enough.

Now, when I find myself building the mountain of to-dos, I ask myself three quick questions:

• Is the urgency real or manufactured?

• Will adding this task to my list stop me from taking care of my body, like eating a full meal away from my desk or getting some movement?

• Will this take time away from non-negotiable parts of my day, like writing, being present for my children, time with my husband, or checking in on my parents and siblings?

If not, I have permission to say no. Or not now. Or even never. Even when the voice demanding my time is my own.

My hope is that many of you are entering a period of quiet as the holidays approach. Days with nothing scheduled and where the decision on what to do rests with you. I encourage you all to take that autonomy seriously. Honor it. And make it meaningful.

This will be my last post until the new year, friends.

I am so excited for what January has in store:, my next guests, and all the thoughts and wisdom we’ll share.

Have a wonderful, healthy holiday season and a beautiful new year.

Take care, visionaries.

Faye

A quote

A video

Video Cred: Dr. Dr. Rangan Chatterjee + Gabor Maté